Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
