I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
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