would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
