Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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