Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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