Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Green mimosas i think yes
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
