my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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