the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
