My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
