He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
