I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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