I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
