it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
