At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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