I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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