i was born a porn star she said
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
