Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
