these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
only if we run a train.
done.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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