good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
