You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
