You're so nebulous sometimes
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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