Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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