I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Randomize
