Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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