you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
