shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
