It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Randomize
