My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
