We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The power of my boobs compel you
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
