ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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