forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
ugly people sure do ruin things
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
