So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
