I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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