I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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