we're chasing vodka with high fives
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
