Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize
