But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
