talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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