Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
