i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize