If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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