STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
