kristin has been a bad kristin
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
The air taste purple.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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