and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
