What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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