His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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