You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I will pee on everything he values.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
