I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
