I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
