Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
